Fall For My Scam! Quick!

Notice the usual telltale signs: the check is made out to me but I have to send my name, the form was filled in by computer and they didn't have my name, it involves me doing something (generally sending money) for a check that I have no business getting and which I probably would never see (and if I did it would bounce). And notice the bad english:

Hello Dear,
I have Paid the fee for your Cheque Draft.but the manager of Eko Bank Benin told me that before the check will get
to you that it will expire.So i told him to cash $950,000.00 all the necessary arrangement of delivering the
$950,000.00 in cash was made with GLOBAL MAX COURIER COMPANY.
This in the information they need to delivery your package to you.
DR,Anthony Robert(+22993812182.)
EMAIL:(gm_couriercompany204@yahoo.fr)
1.YOUR FULL NAME
2.YOUR HOME ADDRESS.
3.YOUR CURRENT TELEPHONE NUMBER.
5.A COPY OF YOUR PICTURE
Please make sure you send this needed info's to the Director general of GLOBAL MAX COURIER COMPANY

DR,ANTHONY ROBERT with the address given to you.
Note.GLOBAL MAX COURIER COMPANY don't know the contents of the Box. I registered it as a BOX of an Africa cloths.
They don't know it contents money. this is to avoid them delaying with the BOX. don't let them know that is money
that is in that Box.
Sincerely
Mr.Emma Agu.

Total To Date: $168,920,000

The E-Mail Lottery.

COVENTRY PROMOTIONS
National Office,
157-197 Buckingham Palace Road,
Victoria, London SW1W 9SP
Serial Number: 652-662
Batch number AT-040SB06-07.

TO WINNERS IN OUR PROGRAM

We wish to congratulate you over your success in our computer balloting sweepstake held on Saturday 8th December 2007 This is a millennium scientific computer game in which email addresses were used. It is a promotional program aimed at encouraging internet users; therefore you do not need to buy ticket to enter for the game.

However, your email address was attached to ticket number 021-33600041;with serial number 652-662 draw the lucky numbers 83-14-11-21-69-92-57,which eventually won the lottery in the first category of the draws.

Therefore, you have won a lottery jackpot prize awards of £2,000,000.00 (Two million pounds Sterling Only) This is from total prize money of US$30,000,000.00 distributed to winners from 1st to 3rd categories.

Note that this program was largely promoted and sponsored by a group of philanthropist, industrialists from the internet ware industry and some other big multinational firms who wish to be anonymous.

You may wish to establish contact via e-mail with the particulars presented below citing the batch and reference numbers to this letter.
Telephone lines are open between the hours of 8.00am - 7.30pm on Monday through Friday.

Customer Service Unit,
Tel no: +44-7024080148
Fax No: +44-870-135-2454
Email:paycv@aol.com
Contact person: MR. DANIEL WALLACE

Our winners are assured of the utmost standards of confidentiality, and press anonymity until the end of proceedings, and beyond where they so desire. Be further advised to maintain the strictest level of confidentiality until the end of proceedings to circumvent problems associated with fraudulent cliams.

Naturally, with the number in England and me in California, am I going to (a) call the number (which may very well be real) or (b) use the e-mail address (which is fraudulent)?

If I'm stupid enough to fall for the scam, of course I'm stupid enough to do the time zone conversion and make the phone call...

Total To Date: $167,970,000

Didn't you know? Microsoft uses Yahoo! Mail

DEAR WINNER:NOTIFICATION FROM THE MANAGEMENT'S DESK
this is to inform you that your email has won the consulation prize of
£1000,000.00 in the microsoft uk end of year draws.please contact your
agent with this your Ref#:BTD/968/07,Batch #: 409978E numbers
respectively.
Forward your claims to
Jim Walters
E-mail:microsoft_representatives_agent@yahoo.dk

A U.K. division of Microsoft holds a lottery, so they use a Yahoo! mail server in Denmark?

Total To Date: $163,915,000

When everyone has a lottery, everyone wins!

Microsoft Lottery
Incoporation
Baley House, Har Road
Sutton, Greater London
SM1 4te
United Kingdom.
This is to inform you that you have won a prize money of Five Hundredthousand, Great Britain
Pound Sterlings(£500,000.00) for the month of December 2007 Lottery promotion which is organized
by MICROSOFT LOTTERYINC & WINDOWS LIVE.
YOUR WINNING NUMBER
Batch number.....................YM 09102XN
Reff number.......................YM35447XN
Winning number...................YM09788
(CONTACT PAYMENT MANAGER) To redeem your prize
Name:Mr James Bradley
Email: promo_agent_james3@yahoo.se
Thank you and Accept my hearty congratulations once again!
Yours faithfully,
Mr. Joseph Grant
(Yahoo/Msn Lottery Games/Lottery Coordinator)

The funny part is that I don't use Microsoft Windows.

And I also work for Yahoo!, which is always spelled Yahoo! (with the exclamation point), and which doesn't run a lottery.

Total To Date: $163,715,000

Work: None. Reward: Lots. Feasting on the stupid: priceless.

My Dear Friend,

You might find it so difficult to remember me. Though, it is
indeed, a very long time. On my singular, I am much delighted and
privileged to contact you again, after couple of years now. It takes
fate, courage and God's fearing to remember old friends and at the same
time, to show gratification to them, despite circumstances that made
things, not worked out as we projected then.

I take this liberty to inform you that, the transaction we were
pursing together, finally worked out by God's infinite mercy and I
decided to contact you, just to let you know. You are advised to stop
any further communication with your local representative(s) any
officials (s) department whom may call you or email concerning the
check draft what sum of €1,000.000.00, accept DR. Benjamin KEREKU
Chief Accountant ING BANK Benin Republic

Your are advise not to accept any fax or telephone calls that does
not come from him Because he is the only person I left the order how to
deliver the check draft to you, and you may call him immediately you
received this message for more information through the instruction I
left, I have conscience as a human being, due to your tremendous
effort and contribution to make things work out in retrospect.

Meanwhile, I must inform you that, I am presently in Japan , for
numerous business negotiations and establishment.

I just arrived yesterday night and checked inn, in a hotel and decided
to go down to the hotel business centre to mail you. Now, with my
sincere heart, I have raised and signed an International Cashier's Bank
Draft, to the Sum of €1.000.000.00 (ONE MILLION EURO) only in your
name
as a COMPENSATION to your dedication, humanity and contribution, as it
were.

Contact him now, his Name is DR. Benjamin KEREKU (Chief accountant ING
Bank Benin Republic ) on his E-mail: drbenjaminkereku_80@yahoo.fr
You are to forward to him, the following
1. YOUR FULL NAME & ADDRESS
2. YOUR TELEPHONE NUMBER

He will advise you further about the shipment of the ICBD to your
Residence Address or Office Address you may provide. Feel free to
reach him via this very mail address: drbenjaminkereku_80@yahoo.fr
Most importantly, the ICBD has only validity period of 60 banking
days. So, your early response to that effect, shall be admired. You
have to mind the days on route shipment.

Sincerely Yours,
Dr JOSHUA TAYLOR

"You might find it so difficult to remember me." You think?

Though I find it interesting that this spam message contains a bunch of language idioms which make it sound like it was a direct translation from the guy's original language.

And of course I get this cash reward because of my "tremendous effort", which thus far has been zero...

Total To Date: $162,700,000

Most brazen claim yet.

Usually the amounts that spammers try to attract me with are smallish: hundreds of thousands or millions of dollars. But the way these scams work, you give up a percentage of the amount you are going to "get" in order to help "expedite" the process. (Of course what really happens is that percentage goes into someone else's pocket and you get, well, not a damned thing except perhaps the realization you were taken by a scam artist.)

But these amounts limit the amount the scammer can get from you. For example, if a scammer claims you will get a million dollars, they're going to be lucky to get more than maybe 1% out of you ($10,000) before raising suspicions. (Though if you really are that fucking stupid enough, pardon my french, to fall for such a scam in the first place, they probably will get $50,000 or even $100,000 out of you before you stop throwing money away.)

But now if you ask for a hundred million, then 1% is a million dollars--you're on the hook for the long term.

And this scammer just offered that amount:

Good Day,

I am a Fund Manager with Fidelity Investment UK and I handle all our
Investor's Capital Project Funds that enables me to divert 1.2% Investors
Excess Return Capital Funds to our Magellan Trust Funds Account whereby
anyone can be presented to claim the funds.

On this note, the total sum of £54.745M (Fifty Four Million, Seven Hundred
and Forty Five Thousand British Pounds) has been diverted representing the
1.2% Excess Return Capital Funds from the Investor Capital Project Funds
for 2005/2006.I need a reliable and trustworthy person that can work
this deal out with me so that we can claim the funds as mentioned above.
There is no risk attached and the funds in question can never be dictated
or traced.

Our sharing ratio will be discussed as soon as I receive your response. If
you are interested, get back to me for more details about the deal.


Mr.Tim McCarron.

I mean, talk about having a pair of balls with this one:

(1) I've created a fund that diverts 1.2% of the excess from an investment fund, and I need your help stealing it, and
(2) It's a shitload of money.

If someone ever fell for this hook, they're in for a very long, expensive, and ultimately destructive ride!

Note that this guy just offered me more money than the spams I've received to date!
Total To Date: $161,250,000

You Have Mail!

Hello Dear,
I have Paid the fee for your Cheque Draft.but the manager of Eko Bank Benin
told me that before the check will get
to you that it will expire.So i told him to cash $950,000.00 all the necessary
arrangement of delivering the
$950,000.00 in cash was made with GLOBAL MAX COURIER COMPANY.
This in the information they need to delivery your package to you.
DR,Anthony Robert(+22993812182)
EMAIL:(gm_couriercompany204@yahoo.fr)
1.YOUR FULL NAME
2.YOUR HOME ADDRESS.
3.YOUR CURRENT TELEPHONE NUMBER.
5.A COPY OF YOUR PICTURE
Please make sure you send this needed info's to the Director general of
GLOBAL MAX COURIER COMPANY

DR,ANTHONY ROBERT with the address given to you.
Note.GLOBAL MAX COURIER COMPANY don't know the contents of the Box. I registered
it as a BOX of an Africa cloths.
They don't know it contents money. this is to avoid them delaying with the
BOX. don't let them know that is money
that is in that Box.
Sincerely
Mr.Emma Agu

Note the fun aspects of this e-mail: the blank after "Dear" in "Hello Dear,", which tells me the form didn't have my name in it. Also, even though this is a personal check that is supposed to be delivered to me, they don't know who I am, as usual. Go figure.

And note in the end that we're smuggling money: "don't let them know that is money that is in that Box."

Total To Date: $49,450,000 and some "Africa cloths"

Random numbers.

When people die, they don't have even numbers in their bank account. An estate will often be for some real random number, not some even number of millions of dollars.

When countries run lottos, people don't win random amounts; they win even dollar amounts. Someone usually will win $5 million in a lotto, but inherit $1,341,398.44. It's just the nature of estates verses lottos.

Or so I thought. Apparently the United Kingdom not only draws a random number to pick a winner, but according to this spam, they also apparently draw a random number for the amount of the award:

We are pleased to inform you of the final announcement that you are one
of the winners of the UKONLINE PROMO.AWARDS, held on 1st December,
2007. You have therefore been approved to claim a total sum of £516,778.00
POUNDS STERLING.
Please contact Claims agent.
Mr Peter Taylor(CLAIMS AGENT)
Email:gaming7777@hotmail.com
Full Names, Contact address, Date of birth, Marital status, Tel No, Occupation,Nationality, Country.
Yours Truly,
Lucy Baines
online Co-ordinator

UK£516,778?

Total To Date: $48,500,000 and some change.

Double Jackpot! I See Dead People Edition.

Hello Friend,


We wish to notify you that you were listed as a beneficiary to the
total sum of £4,600,000.00 GBP (Four million Six hundred thousand
British Pounds Sterling) in the intent of the deceased (names now
withheld since this is our First letter to you) who died in a car
accident with his wife and the only son the year 2004, ever since no
one has come for his ESTATE, We have done a research on the family
background and find out that there was no written Will to his estate.
We contacted you because you bear the surname (last name) identity and
therefore can present you as the beneficiary to the inheritance since
there is no written will.


Our legal services aim to provide our private clients with a complete
service. We are happy to prepare wills, set-up and administer Trusts,
carry out the administration of estates and prepare an administer
powers of attorney.


All the papers will be processed in your acceptance. In your acceptance
of this deal, we request that you kindly forward to us your letter of
acceptance; your current telephone and fax numbers and a forwarding
address to enable us file necessary documents at our High court probate
division for the release of this sum of money.


Kindly send your respond to this E-mail Address.
(richferg_11@yahoo.com.hk).


Yours faithfully,
Ferguson Richard.

Lots of dead people apparently are in my life, dying without my knowledge and leaving me tons of money. Cool!

And to think, with all the thousands of people who have my last name, they found me, of all people! Hell, where I grew up there were at least three people at the same bank where I banked who had the same first and last name as I do--my father, myself, and some other guy who we didn't know.

Shazzam!

Total To Date: $47,440,000

Jackpot! Someone's Died!

Dearest One,

It is my pleasure to write you but first I will introduce myself to you. I am a tall slim fair girl and also a student in university before I lost my parents in a car accident early this year so I have been out from school and been looking for a sincere man that I will trust and love.

I am the only child of my late dead parents and that has made me ran away from my house because my uncles are after my life to take away my inheritance which my late father left for me in a security company here in Accra Ghana . My entire dream is to find sombody that I can trust with my life and inheritance and also able to invest it wise in lucrative business.

Nobody knows about the inheritance which worth $5.5 million dollars in Cash put on a trunk box and deposited it in a security company here called Segal Security Company as a family treasure under maximum confidential so that nobody will know about the content which is cash. And I want you to also keep it very confidential till we can be able to claim out the box from the security company so that I will fly to join you immediately for future plans.

I have to trust somebody to save my future and that is why I am trusting you now I want you to understand my critical situation and give me the love and assistance that I need now so that I will have a better life and also enjoy my inheritance with you. I will tell you more about myself as soon as I hear back from you and also build more trust to be able to have a better understanding.

I look forward to hear from you soonest.
Love..Rose

Honestly, when I first skimmed it, the whole "I am a tall slim fair girl and also a student" made me skip it as a porn ad and not a 419 scam--but there is money involved. Nothing gets my attention like tits and cash.

I'm pathetic...

Total To Date: $37,975,000

With a name like that...

Of course someone's more trustworthy if their first name is "Blessing", right?

Compliment,

How are you doing? Hope you have not forgotten me, I am Miss Blessing Paul, the Lady from Benin who contacted you some time ago to assist me secure the release of my inheritance from my late father. Though you were not able to assist me conclude the transaction, I'm happy to inform you about my success in getting those funds transferred under the assistance and cooperation of a new partner from Brazil.

Presently I,m in London-United Kingdom for investment projects with my share of the total sum. meanwhile, I didn't forget your past efforts and attempts to assist me in transferring those funds, I made sure you are not left out the benefit of the transaction hence I kept aside for you sum of 1,200.000.00(ONE MILLION TWO THOUSAND US DOLLARS) Draft. I and my new partner agreed to compensate you with that amount for all your past efforts and attempt to assist me in this matter.

I appreciated your efforts at that time very much, so feel free and get in touch with my Lawyer Barrister Usman Kabiru and instruct him on how to send the Bank draft to you, Please do let me know immediately you receive the Draft so that we can share the joy together after all the sufferings at that time. In the moment, I, m very busy here because of the investment projects and my education which me and my partner are having at hand, finally, remember that I had left instruction to my Lawyer so as soon as you contact him, he will send the Draft to you, so feel free to get in touch with MY LAWYER NOW.Below is the contact of my Lawyer:

BARRISTER USMAN KABIRU .
Phone: +229 93073420
E-mail: ukabiruchambers@yahoo.co.uk

With Best Regards,
Miss. Blessing Paul

Everyone thinks I've helped them in the past. Everyone.

I'm telling you I haven't done a damned thing!

Total To Date: $32,475,000

Think of the poor people! (Take their money.)

This one is unique: rather than a lottery, help transferring some money for some unspecified reason, or an inheritance, this one claims I won a grant from Shell Oil to "alleviate poverty across the globe." I guess the poverty that this is supposed to alleviate is, well, mine...:

NOTICE OF GRANT AWARD

The Shell Petroleum Foundation United Kingdom is glad
to notify you that you have been chosen by the board of trustees and
after series of secret deliberations selected you as one of the final
recipients of a cash Grant/Donation for your own personal, alleviate
poverty across the globe, and business development. The Shell Petroleum
Foundation United Kingdom, it was established in the year 2000 by the Shell
Multi-Million Groups and is now supported by the Yahoo
Incorporation,Microsoft Corporation and Emirates Airlines. To celebrate the
7th
anniversary program, the Shell Petroleum Foundation United Kingdom in
conjunction with other relevant bodies is giving out a yearly donation
of £4,500,000 GB Pounds (Four Million,Five Hundred Pounds Starlings) to
10 lucky recipients.

...

Kindly note that you will only be chosen to receive the donation
once, which means that subsequent yearly donation will not
get to you again. Take time and thought in spending the donation
wisely on a project that will stand the test of time.You were selected
among thelucky recipients to receive the award sum of £450,000.00 GB
Pounds (Four Hundred and Fifty Thousand Pounds Starlings) as charity
donations/Grant
from the Shell Petroleum Foundation United Kingdom in accordance with
the enabling act of Parliament. You will be required to fill the form below
and email it to ourFinance Officer below for documentation and processing
of the remittance of yourgrant.

The stupid thing about this "grant", of course, is that even though I'm only one of ten lucky people who have been selected as deserving of this grant, they still want my name, address, occupation, gender, phone number, and presumably as we move forward social security number and a deposit of some kind to help transfer the money to my bank account.

You'd think if I was one of ten selected in a given year from a 4.5 million pound sterling grant, they'd spend an extra 10 minutes to remember my contact information...

Total To Date: $31,275,000

I'm busy so you better send him your information.

Dear Friend,

It is my pleasure to let you know about my success in getting those fund
transffered under the cooperation of a new partner from Spain. I didn't
forget your past efforts to assit me in transffering those funds.

Now contact my secretary Mr Peter Rapheal his email is (peter_rapheal21@excite.com)
ask him to send you the total $3.2M certified bank draft which i raised
for your compensation .so feel free and get intouched with him and give
him your address where to send the draft.

Therefore, you should send him your full Name and telephone number/your
address where you want him to send the draft to you. Thanks and God bless
you and your family, Hope to hear from you soon.

Let me know immediately you receive it for us to share the joy.i'm very
busy here with investment projects which i am having at hand, finally,i
left instruction to the secretary on your behalf,so feel free to get intouch
with him.

Best regards,
Dr Mark Joel

At least we have a little more imagination here about why I should divulge personal information when my "old friend" who I've worked with in the past should have it on file: it's because he's so damned busy with other scams deals, he doesn't have time to deal with me.

Total To Date: $30,350,000.

For the Love of God, Proof Read Your Spam!

I've noticed that many Spam messages promising all sorts of riches if only suffer from horrible grammar, incorrectly spelled words and incorrectly capitalized sentences--which strikes me as odd, given how much technical sophistication goes into sending these messages out. Case in point:

Dearest Friend,
This is to inform you about my success in getting the money moved under the cooperation of a new partner from paraguay. Now contact my secretary,bank the name of the bank is CONTINENTAL TRUST BANK and this is the Director name Dr Mohammed alifat,

and the bank email address; transferdept555@gmail.com
and the bank email address; transferdept777@gmail.com
telephone nomber; 00229 979 12 195
telephone fax; .+229-9758-7662

tell them that you send by mr johnson peter, to send you $800.000.00 usd which i kept for your compensation for all the past efforts and attempts to assist me in this matter. I have forwarded instruction to the bank to send the money to you, as soon as you contact them so feel free to get in touch with them to send the money to you without any delay. Also, iam advising you to contact them with your informations such as:

*sigh*

Total To Date: $26,850,000.